A Celebration of Life for my Friendship

I appreciate the Celebration of Life from the many U.S. traditions, customs and holidays. In the past, I perceived funerals as very sad and dark. I couldn’t see death as one of the happiest events in life as some tribes do. Both approaches addressing the end of life seem too extreme and too one-sided to me. On the other hand, a “Celebration of Life” has a balance. It reveals family and friends’ sadnesses, griefs, losses, and tears. Also, it reveals sweet memories and stories full of love, happiness, joy, and fun about the deceased person.

At the moment, none of my family members or friends have recently passed away. However, one of my friendships ended this month. Because of the significant emotional impact of this loss on me, I decided to virtually host a “Celebration of Life for my Friendship”. So, today I’m inviting you to join and celebrate this occasion with me by reading my recent poem. I am also sending virtual hugs to those of you who are working through recent grief and loss of family members, partners, friends, pets, or, like in my case, a loss of relationships.

A relationship with my friend
Is ending.
I’m lying on the couch
And wondering
Why in the world
Is it so painful?

I have been in this dark place before,
But I can’t stop crying.
What for?

Why does the beginning of relationships seem
So lovely?
Why is it often so
High quality?
Why do we embrace it
So readily?

How have we managed to go
From point A, “Great!”
To point B, “Horror”?
Are we that ignorant?
– No.

Our expectations for each other have
Irritated us.
Our miscommunications have
Cornered us.
At the end, our avoidance has
Killed “us”.

I wish you had told me what
Bothered you.
I wish I had done the same
For you.

I wish you had not lost your trust
In me
For reasons still unknown
To me.

I cared so much
About you.
I cherished every moment
Spent with you.
I know you enjoyed your time with me,
Too.

Then how and why have things
Changed?
Are we not the same?
Have we changed? Aged?

Please!
Tell me!
Did I miss something?
What? Where? Why?
Why do I need to leave you now?
Really. Why?

Is it because it’s a timely thing
To do?
Or, is it because it’s a “right” thing
To do?

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